Why Are Addicts in so Much Emotional Pain?
Why do addicts seem to have a proclivity towards self destruction?
Why are addicts so inclined to blame others for their own choices?
And the biggie, why do our sponsors teach us to not ask “why”?
Answer number one: THE PROBLEM
I was in so much pain that I needed to numb myself due to a life-time of hiding away my true identity. By hiding intense feelings and thoughts away my pain lived inside me till I finally was taught how to let it all out.
WE THE MEMBERS…AT LEAST THE MAJORITY OF MEMBERS THAT I HAVE HEARD SHARE IN THE ROOMS TEND TO DISLIKE HAVING THEIR MORALITY POLICED OR EVEN QUESTIONED.
Big Book page 45
“Well, that’s exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem. That means we have written a book which we believe to be spiritual as well as moral. And it means, of course, that we are going to talk about God. Here difficulty arises with agnostics.”
Self Esteem is tied to step four along with Fear. Low self worth breeds fear of people. Page 65 of the Big Book verify’s this.
Is blame a character defect or an emotional survival skill? How about it’s both?
Blame rears its ugly head in ways that may surprise many in the realm of recovery. Blame, accusation, and just plain critical fault finding is an unhealthy survival skill for those of us who learned how to live through a life of addiction without snuffing ourselves out because of guilt.
I am a delivered drug addict;(means:rescued by a Higher Power, revived, awoken, set free from obsession and a reprobate mind, put on another path.) I was as devoted to drugs as any slave could be. Finding and seeking drugs was my primary purpose and I did most every demoralizing thing a woman can do to get money and drugs. What I did to myself was traumatic and devastated my emotions, my health, and my mental condition. My first deliverance came after a horrific run of drug and alcohol abuse that stopped when I was 27. Cocaine abuse was the straw that broke the camels back. When I sobered up, I was stricken with anxiety and panic attacks; I had suffered from hepatitis B at least two times and had scars on my arms from repeatedly injecting narcotics.
Recovery Farmhouse hopes to see more stories and insight from Chris Joubert in the near future.
Chris Joubert a recovered addict shares from his up and coming book on addiction and recovery. He speaks and writes in a grounded and emotionally sober manner. His tone seems to exude a certain peace and serenity as he shares on topics of spirituality, and the disease concept .
“I have to mention”, says Chris, “I had a great mentor called Pastor Sophos Nissiotis, the founder of Noupoort Christian Care Centre. His understanding of addiction is unparalleled.”
Definition of Whitewash: To ignore any imperfection, shortcoming, or flaw. To view a person, place, or thing, as flawless.
Addicts are not bad people trying to get good. They are sick people trying to get well first and foremost.
In my interactions with various Facebook recovery groups I have noticed a pattern that emerges often in threads. With diligence members cannot accept one tither of negative information in, about, or around their program of A.A. And God forbid I make a remark about one of our founding fathers being wrong, making a mistake, or acting out in character defects. Oh hell no! The members scream from their hot keyboards as they spit and fume while rambling out their reaction to a perceived insult.
Relapse Feels Horrible here is a great solution for the remorse. It’s one little assignment that is tried and true…if we can just pick up a pencil and paper to do it!!! Relapse brings up a lot of guilt and shame which sucks, however it is the perfect time to get some serious baggage off of our heart.
Relapse Feels Horrible
Here is a great solution for the remorse. It’s one little assignment that is tried and true…if we can just pick up a pencil and paper to do it!!!
Relapse brings up a lot of guilt and shame which sucks, however it is the perfect time to get some serious baggage off of our heart. Building self-esteem happens when we take one right action at a time. First thing, write core feelings. Write the self-loathing and the feelings of utter worthlessness you feel. Example: I feel like a failure, I hate myself for the things I have done to me and others (children especially). Write the fears associated with thoughts like: I let down my fellows, what will they think of me now? I want people to like me but now they will know I am a failure. Write all the society fears associated with relapse. Write the shame of re-entering the rooms after a relapse and what that does to your reputation and how it makes you feel. GET TO THE CORE FEELINGS THAT MOST EVERY RELAPSER FEELS UNLESS THEY ARE A SOCIOPATH or can’t get honest.
When is it Okay for an Addict to Move from “Recovering” into “Recovered”?
If we believe we are emotionally and spiritually healed and have done much work on ourselves in those areas with God’s help, and do not want to drink. We may be “recovered” for real. To thine own self be true.
This is the Foreword to the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous as it appeared in the first printing of the first edition in 1939
“WE, OF Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. To show other alcoholics PRECISELY HOW WE HAVE RECOVERED is the main purpose of this book. For them, we hope these pages will prove so convincing that no further authentication will be necessary.”
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While Sum 41 fans knew frontman Deryck Whibley for his catchy punk-rock anthems and electric live shows, behind the scenes, the singer found himself battling with some serious demons — including a nearly fatal alcohol addiction.
Now healthy and happily remarried, the musician — who was married to Avril Lavigne before their 2009 split — opened up to PEOPLE about hitting rock bottom, his journey to sobriety and Sum 41’s new album, 13 Voices, which Whibley and the band will be touring behind through March 2017. READ MORE HERE
How has the whole process of getting out there and performing changed since your recovery?
I heard a women at a meeting tonight share this: “When I expressed fear my sponsor told me that God is either everything or He’s nothing.” The sponsor made a typical example of the extreme thinking, closed mindedness and lack of balance addicts often experience. Why do I disagree with the statement? Because: THERE IS A WHOLE LOTTA GOD WHO LIVES BETWEEN “ALL AND NOTHING”.
Why does HIGH FASHION often imitate LOW-LIFE? And some thought on annoying status quos.
Captain Kirk and Numba-One are highly ashamed of the extremely low-riding ghetto shorts and the penis coddling associated with it in Earth 2016. They are strictly tighty-whitie boys in high rise pants. And they have that right by God!
Addicts are really good at one thing…”the game of denial”. I blinded myself for many years.
Am I an addict? Addiction is a symptom. What other symptoms do I have going on that may reveal to me what my addiction was really about.
In a crowded room full of people would I be attracted to the sickest person in the room? Have my relationships been riddled with abuse and betrayal? Do I have a problems communicating on a respectful level when I am upset? Do I fear my feelings because they make me intensely miserable? Do I have a hard time sharing my fears and opening up to people? Do I have a hard time sharing my most intimate feelings, hopes, and dreams? Do I have ANXIETY, ANGER, DEPRESSION, LOW SELF ESTEEM? What about mental health problems such as depression, eating disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), PANIC ATTACKS, self harm, suicidal thoughts. Or learning and earning difficulties, lower educational attainment, difficulties in communicating behavioral problems including anti-social behavior, criminal behavior?
The Responsibility Pledge borders on a breach in the principle that AA was built on “there are no dues or fees for AA membership”.
The pledge though well-meaning is a contradiction to our AA founding principle of no dues and especially NO HIDDEN FEES!
The advantages and core level recovery that doing service work gives us is vital for us to stay sober. Telling our story and chairing meetings, going to jails and institutions to carry the message, sponsorship, helping others all these things carve out our very self worth and emotional healing that we desperately need in recovery.